05/15/2026
True story. Names adjusted. Was just other day...
It was supposed to be a simple airport pickup.
I had just finished cleaning the black Buick Enclave for a client arriving at Southwest Florida International Airport. The AC was cold, music was playing softly, and I had my “Naples Concierge Services” sign sitting on the dashboard like a true professional.
Then I watched a couple walk confidently toward a black Buick Enclave parked two cars ahead of me.
Same year.
Same color.
Same tinted windows.
Without hesitation, the opened the rear door, loaded three suitcases inside, and both climbed in like they owned the place.
The only problem?
It wasn’t their driver.
It was just some random uber driver named Henry pulled up..
From my car, I could see them slowly leaving. I immediately call them and see them turning around in absolute confusion as they started discussing dinner plans.
They both looked up and said,
“Port Royal, please.”
Henry blinked twice. Ok
“Uh… ma’am… I’m waiting for Linda.”
The husband froze.
There was a long silence.
Then the wife whispered,
“Oh my God.”
They both jumped out of the vehicle so fast one suitcase tipped over and exploded open across the curb. Socks, flip flops, and somehow an entire Costco-sized bottle of sunscreen rolled into traffic.
Meanwhile, I was trying not to laugh from my own matching Enclave.
That’s when the husband spotted me.
Another black Enclave.
Another driver sitting there.
Another moment of confidence.
He points at me and says,
“THAT’S our car!”
So they rushed over, apologized, loaded everything up, and climbed inside.
Five minutes later we’re heading toward Naples when the wife suddenly asks,
“Wait… where’s Gary?”
I said,
“…Who’s Gary?”
Turns out they accidentally left one of their carry-on bags in poor Gary’s Enclave.
So now I’m driving around the airport in circles while this retired man is hunting us down like we stole his passengers.
Eventually Gary pulls up beside us at a red light, holding the missing bag out the window like it’s a hostage exchange.
The husband rolls down the window and yells,
“THANK YOU, GARY!”
Gary yells back,
“TELL LINDA I’LL BE LATE!”
To this day, whenever I pick up clients in a black SUV, I keep the doors locked until I verify names.
Because apparently every black Enclave at the airport is now public transportation.
